First off, thank you for the advice on the follow-up appointment, it really helped me get primed with some good questions to ask.
Now for the results…most likely bad luck! Of the 12 mature follicles, we only got 6 eggs, which surprised Dr. D a little, but all 6 eggs were mature and fertilized. Once fertilized 3 of the 6 stopped growing, they implanted the 4 cell, 5 cell and 6 cell embryos all rated A (ratings A-D with A being the best), ideally they should have been 6-8 cells, but pregnancy can result from a 4 cell embryo. My E2 level was good (2400 3 days before retrieval and 2000 2 days before – it dropped because they had me stop the Menopur after the 2400 result). Most surprisingly were C’s little swimmers! He had been ranging in counts from 6-7 million and the day of retrieval he was at 31 million with great motility, Dr. D said it was an above average sample. Which led me to think three things, 1) maybe his surgery was successful, it just a long time to get his boys going again, 2) if he is now “cured” maybe we could actually get pregnant on our own! and 3) the lab screwed up and had the wrong sample (in which case it is a relief that it did not work). We asked if there was anything in my blood work that would have indicated a possible issue, or anything else with me – she said no, I am ideal, I am the type of patient they hope for. So what the heck happened if I am ideal and C’s sample was above average?? Dr. D said it must have been either bad luck or abnormal embryos (being 39, at least 50% of my eggs are likely to be abnormal).
These results give me mixed feelings. I feel good because we didn’t find anything that points to a serious problem that will hurt our chances when trying again, but then I am a little sad and angry that it didn’t work if everything was supposedly so good. I will count my blessings and we will move forward.
After the appointment we talked about how we felt about everything and our options. We discussed with Dr. D the fact that if C’s counts stay as good as they were, IUI with injections is a good option for us. The risk we run there is if his counts fluctuate as much as it seems, and they are low the day of insemination we are screwed (no pun intended). We discussed the move to a new clinic, which we had already decided to do anyway. While I am confident that the information Dr. D provided us is accurate and she is a nice person and easy to work with, she does come across as sort of a salesperson (not in a good way). When asked specific questions, her responses are many times explaining the same thing she just explained with our previous question. So while she is answering our questions, it is not always with as much detail as we would like, it sometimes feels like a canned response. I also can’t help but have the results from the CDC website swimming around in my head – <8%, <8%… That is really low, even for some one pushing 40 like me. So some time after the start of the new year, we will make an appointment to talk with a different clinic.
This brought us to the discussion of time, and me not wanting 6 months to go by and having done nothing that moves us closer to being pregnant. But that brings up the money discussion, which is a difficult one. C feels the pressure being the sole income in the house right now, and I feel like less than nothing because I still have not found a job after being laid off a year ago. My parents have offered help, my parent’s friends have offered help as they went through their own fertility difficulties, even saying they would hold a fundraiser for us, but C’s pride prevents him from wanting to accept help. I understand that, our household income is good compared to many, so we shouldn’t need help. But we also didn’t plan for me to lose my job or to have to spend $30,000 plus to try to get pregnant. We are working through this issue, and we will make it work, we always do.
On a non IF related front, we got out tree on Friday after our appointment. Of course it was the coldest day in 8 months!! But the nursery wasn’t busy and we found our tree quickly! We got a decent size tree and it wasn’t that expensive, perfect!! Because I had class yesterday, we haven’t decorated yet. We carried all of the decorations up from the basement this morning, I am going to start a pot of chili and while it is cooking I will string the lights. I always do the lights, then we both put the ornaments on. We will probably put on a cheesy Christmas movie, eat our chili and spend the evening decorating the tree. Sounds like a perfect evening to me!!
I LOVE YOU=8 letters which gives you 8 rules :
1- Thank the person who nominated you for this award and write a little bit about why you love them.
2- Copy the logo and place it on your blog.
3- Link to the person who nominated you for this award.
4- Nominate no more than 17 people (why 17?) who you love or you think could use some love.
5- Write one word (you can only use a word once) about what you love about their blog.
6- You cannot nominate someone who has already been nominated-the love has to spread to all.
7- Post links to the 17 blogs you nominate.
8- Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know they’ve been nominated.
